"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and He saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18

This site brought to you by Lifted Hearts
and Tigress Luv, The Breakup Guru

Break Up Articles
Our Break Up Community
Breakups

My Breakup Space
My Breakup Blog
My Big Breakup
Breakups Magazine
Gay/Lesbian Advice
Date a Millionaire
Get Your Boyfriend Back
Win Your Girl Back

Cunnilingus Academy
Curl her toes with these tips and techniques!

Why Men Leave

Win An Ex Back eBooks

why women cheat
stop his commitmentphobia
perfect love letters

FOR THE WOMEN WE HAVE THE ZODIAC MAN! Because not all men are alike the plan to win back their heart, or win over the heart, shouldn't be the same either! 

How sad would be November if we had no knowledge of the spring! ~~Edwin Way Teale

"If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself but to your own estimate of it;
and this you have the power to revoke at any moment."

--Marcus Aurelius

"You cannot step twice into the same river;
for other waters are always flowing on to you."
~~Heraclitus

Breakups  & Relationship Articles - Enjoy these articles, all intended to help you get over a breakup and feel better today!

One year since Living in Beer Can Alley
Posted by MO on 9/19/2001, 7:41 pm (taken, with permission, from the Lifted Hearts Network message boards)

So, as with Stacy and NR, the one year anniversary of my breakup came upon me last month. Instead of journaling, as so many people do to get through their heartbreak, I chose to write a story of what my life was like with this jerk.

Living in Beer Can Alley

Any woman on the verge of marriage entertaining the idea of moving into her man’s home, especially if his kids live with him, should consider the possible repercussions before she ends up on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

After moving into my ex’s “home” with his 16-year old son, it’s a surprise that my sanity remained stable enough to even write this story. Here are some highlights of this most memorable experience.

First and foremost, think about privacy and boundaries for your own space – because there won’t be any. His 23-year-old daughter came over almost every night. And when she’d stumble through the door, her first words were always "Ohhhhhhh, hehehehehe, I'm sooooo stoned!" Just a guess here, but I’m imagining her first baby words were “pipe da-da!” Smoking pot with your kids, in my eyes, is not exactly a Disney moment. Since I was outta there before the holidays, this was my vision of how they spent Christmas morning. Boob and his two kids sprawled out around the Yule tree -- *pffffffff!* cough* *cough* Merry *cough* Christmas *cough* daaaad, **uh ahhh* merry *pfffffffffff* Christmas, Erica. *cough* *cough* Here Aaron, wanna hit? *choke* *pffffffff* here man. Yeah right, while they were unwrapping their cannibus, bowls, bags and bongs. Sly and the Family STONED.

Now on to the house -- Ohhhhhhh, that lovely little house. A most elegant tapestry of the late Jerry Garcia, the size of a patchwork quilt, hung in the living room. Hanging next to that magnificent work of art on the shit-brown paneling were shotguns and antlers. And to show his feminine side, were those hanging wild-life plates that you send away for. I swear I felt like I was living at the Elk’s club. It’s no wonder every time I walked into the house I had a sudden urge to sport a raccoon hat.

Since there was no kitchen table, we ate on elegant folding card tables in the 6 x 8 living room, facing a 60-inch wide TV screen. You never realize the stuff up someone’s nose until you’ve seen his mug on a 60-inch wide ass screen. And I’ve seen more close-ups of the uvula than I care to recall.

In the retro 60's bathroom were "Earth Day" and Woodstock '69 posters of naked hippies. I think he thought Earth Day meant that you keep piles of junk around your house and never throw it away.

Our bedroom walls were graced with Wayne Gretsky posters, fishing poles and baseball hats. On the top shelf of his dresser were bottles of cheap booze all neatly lined up in a row. When I had to go to the bathroom at night, I needed a metal detector just so I wouldn't kill myself falling over all the exercise equipment he kept in the bedroom. And that equipment was just a place for his work clothes cause his drawers were filled with auto parts/pool parts/pennies and bank deposit slips from 1974.

There were only THREE people living in this place. And there was no room in the kitchen because it had 10-packs of everything all over the place. His motto? Why, it was "Buy 11, get 1 free!" There wasn't even room for a measly box of spaghetti in the pantry because it was jam-packed with 80 dusty jars of spaghetti sauce that he'll never get to in this lifetime.

The dishwasher was the kind you hooked up to the sink. So you had to pole vault over the long black hose just so you could get to the dishes. Come summer, in order to strut your stuff in that dank kitchen you had to “bread” your feet in powder – that’s right, dip em in egg, then in powder, just so they wouldn’t stick to the floor.

And shopping, ohhh shopping was such a nightmare for me. I hated buying milk – because that meant I'd have to spend the afternoon trying to find room for it in the refrigerator. There are only so many ways you can re-arrange “two for $5.00” cartons of orange juice, the 700-ounce jar of grape jelly and the 24-pack of Coors lite. I couldn’t even fit stuff on the side doors of the fridge because they were crammed with batteries and vita-veeta-vegeman bottles.

When I opened the freezer it was like I’d won the frozen food lottery. It was so bad that the county had to enforce a helmet law for his kitchen. I mean it took me an hour just to try and fit one pint of Haagen-Dazs next to his box of frozen anal suppositories.

We needed another addition to the house just to store the 175-pack of paper towels, the 102-pack of Charmin, and the 50-pack of snot rags. I didn’t need to exercise because trying to find room for all this junk alone was my daily stress test -- all this crap for a family of three. Now I know why he’d attach a trailer with a red flag and a sign “WIDE LOAD” to the back of his SUV every time he went shopping. This man was the proto-type for the suckers’ price clubs had in mind.

Now on to the outside of the house -- no grass, but a big ass 50 square-foot block of railroad ties. This was the front of the house, not the back. I guess it was the artist in him that thought having a vegetable garden the width of your house was a unique idea. Yeah – maybe if it didn’t have a dozen black plastic hoses strewn about that block of dung to water the summer’s bounty. Then there’s the driveway – I think it was supposed to be stones, but they looked more like rocks to me. Every time I got in my car I’d bring a few rocks in with me. So my car had to be excavated weekly. And there wasn’t too much room for a car in that “driveway” either because you had to park next to a hockey net and a rowboat.

The final straw came when his next door neighbor took him to the zoning board because he never got a variance for the small deck he’d built for the hot tub on the side of the house. So, the deck holding the hot tub had to come down. Well guess where the hot tub went? Right smack dab on the main deck that faced the street. Cars would drive by blowing their horns and laugh while he was blowing bubbles out of his ass in the hot tub. What a sight. So I suggested we haul the shower stall and toilet out in the road– just for a little balance.

Well, that was the day I packed my undies and toothbrush and hitched my butt up to Woodstock. And I have never looked back wondering “What about Boob?”

This is a true story. However, the count sizes of the paper-towels, etc., have been changed to protect the innocent.

MO (MO is a member of the Lifted Hearts Network Community)

Return to Breakup Articles

Want to chat with someone who understands the pain and turmoil
you are going through with your breakup? Want to learn how to get over your breakup, once and for all, or do you want to learn how to
reverse your breakup and save your relationship?
If you answered 'Yes' to these questions, then click HERE.

To Love Yourself! 

"IT IS REWARDING to find someone you like, but it is essential to like yourself. It is quickening to recognize that someone is a good and decent human being, but it is indispensable to view yourself as acceptable.  It is a delight to discover people who are worthy of respect and admiration and love, but it is vital to believe yourself deserving of these things. For you cannot live in someone else. You cannot find yourself in someone else. You cannot be given a life by someone else. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime, you are the only one you will never leave or lose. To the question of your life, you are the only answer. To the problems of your life, you are the only solution."
~JO COUDERT , American writer